It’s Only Natural

14 Jul

If you think about it, people who are questioning or discontent with their gender should be the majority, not the minority in our society. The same goes for people who are questioning their sexual orientation. All human beings should question both of these patriarchal ideas. Regarding gender. Isn’t it more logical to be confused and discontent with the patriarchal prescribed gender roles, then to be compliant? Aren’t these gender constructs dysfunctional and the anti-thesis of liberation?  If we were all awake to our patriarchal brainwashing, wouldn’t we all be gender dysphoric? Do we really believe that gender roles; femininity and/or masculinity are natural? Isn’t femininity stripped down to its foundation subservient behavior and masculinity dominant behavior?

Should either one of these dichotomies be associated with either biological sex? Aren’t males and females a balance of both and so much more? Aren’t we all complex human beings?  Shouldn’t we be able to be authentic to ourselves and not be forced into behaving feminine or masculine because of our biological sex? We live in a social system that is dictating to us how males and females should behave which benefits patriarchy and the mandate that men must dominate women. Our society sets human beings up for questioning or being confused about their gender because the gender constructs are so constricting and rigid and the pressure to be one or the other is tremendous.

We have to ask ourselves why is this the case, that our society cannot have males acting feminine and females acting masculine? Why is this such a taboo to the extent that we are poisoning and torturing our children physically just to make sure this doesn’t happen? Why is it that when a child or adult naturally and healthily questions their gender, instead of allowing and supporting the questioning and rebellion, we coerce them into believing they are deviant and have a disorder and put a band aid on them instead of trying to cure the actual problem that created the gender dsyphoria in the first place?

Could the answer be that patriarchy can’t have feminine/subservient men therefore we must force the men who behave this way into looking like women? We can’t have masculine/dominant women therefore we must force the women who behave this way into looking like men? Isn’t coercing people to surgically change their bodies to look like the other sex to match their behavior not only a form of physical torture for rebelling against gender, but also at its base level, a patriarchal mandate to ensure that females remain subservient to males? A mandate to keep patriarchy in tact at the detriment of the human beings who live in it?

It amazes me that we can’t see as a society that it is the gender roles that are the problem and that being confused or discontented with the same is not an individual disorder but a healthy and natural response to a much larger disorder.

The same goes for the patriarchal idea of sexual orientation, that heterosexuality is normal and anything else is deviant. If you think about it, isn’t being a lesbian in patriarchy a more healthy response to our patriarchal environment than being heterosexual?  In patriarchy aren’t men the anti-theses of female liberation and safety?  Isn’t it true that men disrespect, violate, rape and murder females on an epidemic level?  Yet we are being coerced into believing that heterosexuality in said environment is normal and natural?  Is the idea that we must love and be with men, who do these things to us, logical or reasonable in any way?

Just like gender roles and the idea that females should be feminine/subservient and males should be masculine /dominant, the idea that heterosexuality is normal and anything else is deviant is also a LIE.

Gender roles were created by men so that they could have license to oppress and dominate women. Heterosexuality was also created by men so that they could have access to oppress and dominate women, both are the foundation of patriarchy. Let’s face it; women are not safe around men. You take men out of the equation and women are no longer in danger. So why then are we being told that it is right and normal to be with men or to be heterosexual? What is also interesting is that the idea of being born gay is now mainstream whereas historically it was all about choice. Why do you think this idea changed from being a matter of choice to now being a matter of biology? Delilah Campbell wrote:

“In the heyday of the Women’s and Gay Liberation Movements, the view was widely held that sexuality was socially constructed, and indeed relatively plastic: lesbianism, in particular, was presented by some feminists as a political choice. But in the last 20 years this view has largely withered away. Faced with well-organized opponents denouncing their perverted ‘lifestyle choices’, some prominent gay/lesbian activists and organizations began promoting the counter-argument that homosexuals are born, not made. Of course the ‘born that way’ argument had always had its supporters, but today it has hardened into an orthodoxy which you deviate from at your peril.

Since ‘born that way’ became the orthodox line, there has been more mainstream acceptance of and sympathy for the cause of gay/lesbian equality, as we’ve seen most recently in the success of campaigns for same-sex marriage. Though it is possible this shift in public attitudes would have happened anyway, it seems likely that the shift away from social constructionism helped, by making the demand for gay rights seem less of a political threat. The essentialist argument implies that the straight majority will always be both straight and in the majority, because that’s how nature has arranged things. No one need fear that granting rights to gay people will result in thousands of new ‘converts’ to their ‘lifestyle’: straight people won’t choose to be gay, just as gay people can’t choose to be straight.”

If females especially resist the patriarchal idea of “heterosexuality” and claim to be born gay, they then are not a threat to patriarchy and it’s oppressive ideas, because then society can claim they are deviant. That they are victims to their biology and have no choice in not wanting to be with men. Their lesbianism is being dictated by their biology, not because men are abusive & disrespectful.  On the other hand, if females are actively choosing not to be with males, to not be heterosexual, this is a threat to patriarchy because they are doing the sane and reasonable thing. These women are not seen as victims to their biology like women who claim to be born gay.  This choosing brings up more questions and the patriarchal powers that be, don’t want these questions to see the light of day.

People who claim to be born gay can more easily gain the legal rights and protections that they need within the patriarchal box without threatening the actual box. This was the only way that the LGB community could protect themselves against discrimination within patriarchy. The same is true for the trans-activists who are using the same biological agenda to gain rights and protections they need and want, some turning out to be to the detriment of females.

What is important here is that we need to allow women to choose freely whether or not they want to be with men and to not make them feel that they must feel biologically compelled to not be with men, like they have no choice when in fact they do and the only sane and safest choice is to choose not to be with men.

What is ironic and perplexing however is that the need for this biological platform wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for the patriarchal ideas (lies) about gender and sexual orientation. We are all born into an oppressive anti-female society that is dictating to us very restrictive ideas about gender and sexual orientation for one reason–to keep women under the control of men which keeps patriarchy strong. When human beings are born into such an oppressive strict system of rules for gender and sexual orientation, it is only natural that they resist such ideas. The surprising thing is that more of us don’t. And even more ridiculous is that the ones who are resisting are considered deviant. That is a testament to how powerful patriarchal conditioning and coercion really is.

When we do resist within such an oppressive system, we are then deemed “deviant” by the system and must fight to not be discriminated against by the same system, when in reality it is the system that needs to be abolished, it is the system that ails us all.  Just like gender, sexual orientation is being dictated to us by our social system. This is why gender roles and heterosexuality is so important because they both keep patriarchy strong.  So then I ask you, even though we are taught that it is only natural to be feminine women, masculine men and/or heterosexual human beings, isn’t the opposite true? In patriarchy, isn’t it more  natural to question, resist and actively rebel against these ideas?


Michele Braa-Heidner


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